i would hate to this blog of mine with a sad entry. but as of now, i don't feel very happy. i feel sad, lonely and disappointed. for years, ive always wanted to take HRIM, i never thought that i would have an argument with my dad regarding my course. a lot of people have that problem and i guess im one of them too. i am now forced to take up a course that i dislike. i am forced to take up a course that i never imagined myself in. i am forced to take up a course that does not make me happy. if i take up this course, everything would change. my life, my attitude and my future. my life would. i am forced by the person who knows me. he knows that i dont like it but he believes that i would succeed someday. i do not want to let him down and i do hope that i won't but in those years that i am making him proud, i am letting myself down.

when i do take this road i know there is no turning back. i would just fall and cry on the way. the people who knows what i really want would know that i am hurting inside. right now, all my dreams are gone. they are slowly fading away. all i could do is cry.

fine, ill take up that course but i will NEVER, ever be the same again. i know i would never be as happy if i took up my dream course. dream course.. it will forever be a dream.

Di ka magpapatuloy sa daan kung hindi ka pa nakatayo ng mabuti sa huli mong paghulog. Dati, nahulog ka pero walang sumalo. Unti-unti kang tumatayo.. kung hindi ka makatayo ng tuwid, hindi ka pa makakalakad.

All this time, i thought that I'm over him.. but i guess im not.. i fell before but i'm still not standing straight. all this time, i was still there on the ground.. i can't stand up because i still feel that what if something might happen.. maybe he would help me up.. maybe he would support me.. but for years, i've been waiting and nothing has come.. now, i could see him cathcing another girl.. i look at them.. and im still on the ground.. all i could do is look down and cry...